It has been a long while since I last put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard in the 21st century world we live in) to communicate my views of the world to the great and faithful J Dawg blog readers.

For new readers to this blog, I will quickly explain what is about, then include a few helpful tips as to how to go about reading the rest of it. It began in my first year at Swansea University where I was a resident in Langland halls. I was bored midway through my second term, and my flatmate Georgia (referred to often in previous pages as G Dawg) said one day, "J Dawg, why don't you write a blog? You seem to have an unhealthy excess of free time on your hands and there are simply not enough people in this flat to keep you entertained all the time!"

"A blog," I thought, as I sat in our fifth floor kitchen, idly a-gazing at the people walking the paths below. "This could be a useful way to spend my time. The world does need to hear the opinions of a university geography student, with too much time and a strangely-adept but ultimately useless flair for creative writing." So I set about writing said blog, and it rapidly became a hit with the great and the good of the Langland social circles. With a little help from the aforementioned G Dawg, and our pals in a neighbouring flat, notably Caitlin (Pigsy), Jess (J Dawg II) and Kenny (K Dawg, the original), we began churning out humourous insights into university life.

In terms of ways to read the blog, one should adopt a quasi-ironic tone and take everything written with a metaphorical pinch of salt.

Sadly, and due entirely to my own lethargy the blog found itself mothballed in the latter stages of the summer term, akin to my Olympic cycling dream of '08. It's funny how these things just disappear with time,

But unlike my Olympic cycling ambitions, the blog is making a welcome or perhaps otherwise (exasperating?) return to Swansea computer screens!

Not all of the entries included in this blog are written by myself; some are selected guest blogs. Notable entries include G Dawg's introduction, Pigsy's grandmother's arrest, K Dawg's drunken tae kwondo incident and J Dawg II's emotive account of the summer ball. Together we make up j-dawg.webnode.com.

So, as I sit here now in the bedroom of my second year house situated much too far away from the university (the walk is horrible and it's always raining), I find myself once again allowing the proverbial juices to flow through my fingertips and onto paper for the public to read. Hopefully over the coming months many more blog entries will grace this website, with more witty guest blogs from the ensemble cast.

In the meantime,

Yours sincerely,

J Dawg

The time has come. It appears that our fresher’s year is over (or nearly over for the lucky few still living it up in Costa Del Swans). We are all rather emotional that we will no longer be living in quite such close proximity together, in the Langland halls of residences. Luckily, for the next academic year most of us will be living in the up-market area of Brynmill, so will be not too far from each other and can still have crazy pre-drinks and organise daytime activities together.
 

I think we would all agree that the past year has been an exceptional one…from Fresher’s week where we barely knew each other and there were many awkward conversations, to the more recent beach times and nights out where we felt like we had known each other for a lifetime. In order to round up such a year, once exams were over, we took it upon us to make the most of living the high-life and do everything we could to have a good time.
 

The motto we decided to live by is YOLO, which is an acronym for ‘You Only Live Once.’ In essence, if you question doing something, you should just do it, because you do, in fact, only live once. 
 

The Urban Dictionary (2012), claims that ‘YOLO’ is ‘Mainly used to defend doing something ranging from mild to extreme stupidity.’ Of course, we would not do anything that is ‘extremely’ stupid, but may have participated in a few activities which we would not have, if we weren’t living by YOLO.

 
We began to use this phrase during a game of Innuendo Bingo. [If you do not know what this is, everyone sits in a circle and listens to some audio clips on the radio. However, there is a catch. Each participant must fill their mouth with water, so that if during the clip there is an innuendo, they will laugh and the water will spill out of their full cheeks. (Please note, there should be a large bin in the centre of the circle so that the water doesn’t go everywhere) This is a very fun game although can result in the participants being soaked in water.] During this game, James Smith asked a question in which we all had the same answer – ‘Do you ever get a sudden urge, to just do something out of the blue that you wouldn’t normally do?’ Pigsy’s reply was exactly what we were all thinking – ‘yes.’ In this moment, she decided to throw a few of my glasses out of the window, and shouted YOLO. This was the beginning of many YOLO moments.
 

One time where myself, JDawg #1 and JDawg#3 (Jammer) shouted YOLO was after a night out on Wind St. We had had a post-night snack from the fast food outlet McDonalds, and were still munching as we came back to floor 5. JDawg himself threw his rubbish out of the window, and shouted YOLO, as this was something he would not normally do. However, the sheer exhilaration shown on his face was seen by myself and JDawg#3, so we took it upon ourselves to follow in his footsteps, and start throwing things out of the window too. The throwing of items built up, and accumulated in the kettle being thrown out of the window. Despite the fact that this meant we were down on a kettle and that some poor man from Residential Services had to clean up all of our rubbish from outside the building, it was definitely worth it. 
 

All in all, the YOLO attitude of life is a fun one to have. Why not do what you want to do when you want to do it? You might die tomorrow.
 

Peace and love, J Dawg #2.

Don’t forget, you only live once- YOLO!

Greetings blog followers, 

I realise it has been quite a while since we last spoke, but I am back today to bring you another blog on the cutting edge of contemporary issues. Just briefly, a quick explanation for my long absence: after Pigsys last blog I thought I would give the world a moment to catch up with what she said. It was such a good blog that views rocketed, compliments came flying in and J-Dawg got worried about his position being usurped. Nevermind, I am back now at the mid-point of an end of exam, all week mad one to speak to you about the contentious subject of napping. *Disclaimer: the following is slightly exaggerated and despite this, however it may appear, I am not a bit odd, and incapable of going through a day without a quick sleep.*

No day is so bad it can't be fixed with a nap.  (Unknown)

I have always been napping's number one fan. Those who have known me for a long time will be more than used to the sight of me catching a bit of shuteye in the afternoon. As a child, a day wasn't complete without a brief siesta to escape the scorching west-midland sun. When I first started primary school and the teachers tried to drum napping out of us children, while others bowed to social convention and grew up, I maintained my napping habits like the Peter Pan of the napping world.  I continued to grow and I found my days became more busy, full of extremely taxing activities and things to do. Here, naps became more important: fuel, as it were, to help me to pursue the rest of the day without fear of fatigue or lethargy. Now I have arrived at university, I have been united with kindred napping spirits. For at school, I was very much in the minority. People used to say 'J-Dawg, why are you snoozing on the sidelines of the rugby pitch?' or 'Why do you never attend the first two lessons after lunch most days of the week?' Here at university, I can count no less than 6 people on my floor alone who are known to enjoy a casual relaxatory moment. G-Shady, at the forefront of nap-discovery and an icon to those of us who get grumpy without a nap, has been known to spend whole afternoons asleep, in blissful peace, with nothing to worry about, save when to wake up for food. She is a hero, defying cultural norms and rejecting stereotypes, blazing a way to a brighter, happier and more refreshed future.

For I genuinely feel for people who are incapable of taking time out in the day to lie down, close their eyes and have a few moments rest. The day does not need to be so busy that they cannot find time for themselves. As Elliot Reid says in Scrubs: 'You need to take care of yourself before you can begin to take care of others.' If you go through the day without a break, you can end up quick-tempered and irritable, unco-operative and unhelpful.

I can however see why some people are anti-napping, and therefore, why we will never get along. It could be argued that naps are a waste of a day; that they bring about odd sleeping patterns and leave people irritatingly uncontactable for large periods of the day. To these people, I say imagine a world where everyone rushes around, the only thing to look forward to being getting drunk at the pub on a friday and waking up with a sore head on saturday, then facing another whole week of rushing round without the bigger picture in mind. 

To nap is to take a leaf out of the 'Underachiever's Manifesto' (a small book available on Amazon, well worth a read). In his book, Ray Bennet describes the flaws in our target driven, egotistical society, where if you haven't given everything 110% you may as well not have tried. 

Take a step back, get a fresh perspective. 24 hours is a long time and days can get super-tiring. 

I'm off to have a nap, all this typing has made me tired.

Peace,

J-dawg

To all J-dawgs fan, it is the one and only Pigsasauras here, doing my next guest blog. Before, I start I'd like to just clear up any conlfliction with K-dawgs tragic accident before hate sights pop up all over the internet.

I have no control over my door frames' where abouts and it has been there long before Kenny moved in and as I was partying in another flat at this point hold no responsibility. However, I do send my best wishes, hoping he makes a speedy and safe recovery in order to party for his birthday in June.

I have been picked as the next guest blogger as I have an interesting/worrying tale to tell you all regarding my maternal Grandmother's antics.

I will take you back to last Friday, I was sitting at my desk with my revision in front of me looking at the mountains and debating if it was a good idea to hit the student union night know as Tooters. J-dawg II was lucky enough to have finished her exams that afternoon and so was rushing around Langland distracting other people and persuading them to come out with her. I could hear the confusion outside my door and then I received a knock. At the door was the equally blonde G-shady, who strolled in and informed me of her decision to Toot that evening.

As I sat on my desk, I thought about the 3 pending exams I had the following Monday - Wednesday but as I thought that, another thought came to my head... YOLO!!!!

As these yolo-ing thoughts were going through my head, my mobile phone started to ring, on the phone was my Mum.

'Darling, the most awful thing has happened'. I could sense the distress/humour in her voice.

I will now inform you of the content of that darkened phone call. I shall set another scene, Thursday night in suburban Manchseter, a small blonde woman (approx. 4''11) was out to dinner with her boyfriend and at this dinner she had a glass of white wine. This woman, is my Gran and her idea of a 'glass of wine' is not the same as the average person's idea of a 'glass of wine' and is closer to half a bottle.

As she came home from dinner that evening, she had another social event to go to, a birthday party at her friend Barbara's, as Pamela made her way over to Barbara's in her little green car, she was apparently hesitating and swerving as she drove. As a result of this, she was pulled over by the Police.

She was asked to get into the back of the van and asked how much she had been drinking, clearly drunk she giggled and replied 'a glass of wine... or two!!'

Concerned about her driving abilities, she was informed she would have to be breathalised. Unable to stop giggling out of nerves, she asked 'What was going to happen to her? And where am I going to go?'

She was told that if she were found over the limit (which was very likely) she would have to go to Cheadle Hulme police station in a cell over night. She then replied, 'I'm going to a party tonight, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to do that'. They informed her it was the law and that were the correct procedures that had to be followed. She replied saying, she would be having a 'pot of tea' at the party and so there was no problem and could she go or she was going to be late.

Luckily, there was a problem with the breatheliser equipment and they had to wait 50 minutes in the police car for another car to come with the correct equipment. I did question what else the Police could've been doing with their time whilst they were keeping a 76 year old woman captive in their car but that's a question for Scotland Yard and ultimately David Cameron.

Finally, the equipment arrived however out of nerves, my Gran was unable to do it. She was given four attempts, and still couldn't do it. The policewoman informed her that if she couldn't do it on her next go, she would be arrested. Not surprisingly, she couldn't do it and the police said with much regret they would have to take her to a cell.

Getting rather hysterical now, she asked for one more go, they reluctantly agreed and she left herself have 15 minutes to prepare. By this time she had been there an hour and a half and she was in fact on the limit.

The police let her go, with a formal warning to be impended on her record and a recomendation of not to drive after 6pm due to her low skills.

My mum, finding the whole ordeal just as hilarious, informed my Gran she had to go and tell my Uncle immediately. As I receieved calls from various cousins and uncles/aunties, it was decided her car keys be confiscated from her for the next 2 weeks, a punishment allowing her to think about her careless behaviour, endangering herself and others.

The last time I spoke to my Gran, she was infact driving whilst on the phone.. and it was 9pm...

Some people don't learn their lessons, K-dawg this blog applies to you also.. - don't drink and drive, don't drink and show off taiquando moves.

Peace out j-dawg fans and keep safe

xoxoxox

Love Pigs x

Greetings all,

It gives me great pleasure to say that I have here a true literary gem. Following is an account by K-Dawg of his 'accident' as promised in my last blog. Enjoy!!

It started out as any normal Tooters night, Pre-drinks had been brought, people invited round, and Caitlin eagerly telling people to hurry up and start drinking. The flat of the famous 509'ers had been taken over by what must have been an army of medical students and rugby players - all of them tall and intimidating to the normal lad such as I. 

I better introduce myself - my name is Sean Kenny - or K-Dawg (the origional) the witiest and dam right coolest person your ever likely to meet (cough). I had been enjoying a Coors light or 6 with friends in my room whie keeping up to date with the rugby that night. After many a drink and feeling merry we made our way to Tooters. As always the night was a blur of light, dancing, or in some peoples case i.e Jess Sperring - skanking, and various drinks. 

At 2 o clock to everyone's annoyance, Tooters decided to close, (the cause of this is still unkown) So back to the flat of the 509ers we conferged. The following is hazy so bear with me......

Myself and Joseph both expert martial artist in Taekwondo and JiuJitsu respectively thought it would be a good idea to compare moves in the corridor, kicks seemed to be the order of the day. After much practising, or some would call showing off - i decided to show my signature move, the tornado kick - or jumping, spinning, roundhouse kick, (take your pick). And as i jumped then began to spin, wihtout me knowing i moved closer to the wall. Not knowing of the impending danger i lashed out - to complete my kick, and connected full force with the doorframe that belongs to a certain Caitin Davies. 

The pain was unberable - and i was forced to reire from further demonstrations. I was no longer able to stand on my right foot, and in fear of further embarrasment went to bed. 

The following day i had to go to the hospital, and after extencive x-rays it was apparant that i had fractured a bone in my foot - my metatarsal, and would be forced to use crutches for the next 4 weeks. 

So let this be a lesson to all of you J-Dawg fans out there, drunken martial arts, ultimatley leads to a lott of fun, but a broken foot. 

This K-Dawg - the origional Dawg, saying Peace out, And make Tea not War!!

Laters J-Dawg fans!!!

HIYA GUYS!

It's been almost a week since I last blogged and in that time much has taken place; some toast burning, a mad night out and a visit to the Spar just to name a few. I won't bore you with the details, but focus mainly on the events of Friday.

Friday began with a trip to tesco in the G-Shady deathwagon, a trip eagerly embraced by myself (for food and water), Gayv (for protein) and K-Dawg (for predrink material). It was most generous of G-Shady to offer us the lift and we stepped out of the car with springs in our steps, looking forward to all we could purchase at the supermarket. Gayv got a bit over excited at the thought of replenishing his protein supply, broke a trolley and shouted at a taxi, but apart from that the trip passed uneventful. Coming out of the supermarket, bags in hand, we hopped back in the car and headed back to uni. #winning

Upon our return, preparations began for our big night at Tooters, but not before we enjoyed some well deserved apple pie and custard. Tooters is Friday nights at the student union club, where drinks are £1 and the floor is so sticky it's hard to walk. Normally, J-Dawg II works at Tooters, but she was taking the night off to go on a mad one to celebrate the end of exams, which we all thought was fair enough really.

As 7:30 approached and people started to arrive on Langland floor 5 for pre drinks, it became very obvious that this was going to be a strange one. An intriguing mix of people had been invited, with everyone from big rugby players to mothers of two turning up! We were in for a wild night. As we all became progressively intoxicated, the evening turns into a blur, with cereals, bananas and broken ironing boards flying all over the place. The evening ended with everyone all over the place and J-Dawg II running around shouting 'I'm on a mad one!' Very odd.... K-Dawg had a bit of an accident, which is one of the funniest stories I've heard in a long time, but he'll describe it to you in a guest blog in the near future.

It was a great night, and all not involved were very jealous of all the fun that was had.

Peace,

J-Dawg

PS, it has been said by a certain someones friend that I don't use enough commas in my blog, so being the good taker of constructive criticism that I am, I've tried to use even less commas than usual in this blog.

Greetings blogees!

In today's blog I am going to describe to you all what I did on Tuesday 8th May. I was going to publish this blog yesterday but as I was half way through writing it my internet crashed, erasing all I had done. In a hugely displeased manner, I shut my laptop lid in frustration, shook my fist at the internet and went to make some toast.

Excuse my outburst, but as I am sure all of you can imagine, technical difficulties are one of the biggest challenges facing us bloggers.

Anyway, let me set the scene; Tuesday morning, 9:16 AM, the sun is shining through my curtains as I lie in bed listening to the radio, pondering what the day might throw up. Drifitng in and out of slumber, I was jolted rudely back to reality by the sound of my telephone alerting me to the arrival of a textual message. 'Who could this be, trying to contact me at this ungodly hour?', I thought to myself. After much deliberation as to who this obnoxious person could be, I reluctantly turned over to see who was responsible. 'Twas Gayv (AKA Karen) who thought it necessary to tell me of his impending visit to the Spar. Despite my initial objections at my waking up, I was grateful in that I needed to go with him. Alas, at the expense of my lie in, I literally jumped in the shower, clean and ready for what may well have been my only visit outdoors of the day. 'What did you purchase at the Spar, J-Dawg?'. I hear you ask. I won't bore you with the details, but basically, apples, milk, corn flakes, washing up liquid and unfortunately brown bread (they were out of normal bread, and I, in desperate need of bread made the sacrifice. Gav however, was not so willing and decided to return later to the Spar, when he hoped they had replenished their stock of white bread. They hadn't however, and while he flew into a lack of bread induced rage, I sat there satisfyingly chewing on my albeit nasty brown bread. 15-love.)

I shall now jump on quite a few hours, as otherwise this blog may well go on too long. You haven't missed much; a brief visit to the librabry, and many attempts to do some revision. We pick up at approximately 1724, when K-Dawg (the original Dawg) informs me of his intention to order a pizza. I, along with 5 others willing join, and soon we are munching away at these delightfully healthy dinners. J-Dawg II in a romantic gesture shared a pizza and some chicken wings with someone else, possibly in a indication of things to come? We can only hope! After the pizza, some of us settled down to an evening of revision, while others watched Lord of the Rings, El Returno del Rey, with Spanish subtitles. What a great day we had all had, retiring to our bed chambers, full and content.

In conclusion, as can be very clearly seen from the above stories, I have too much time on my hands. Enclosed is a picture to prove this.

Peace out,

J-Dawg

Hello to all you J-Dawg fans out there, hope you have been enjoying his blogs as much as me.

Glad I have finally got the the chance to introduce myself properly, my name is Georgia/G-sady/BigG/Miranda and I am the self proclaimed genius who came up with the idea of J-Dawgs blog so that he could share his immense wit and undoubtable humour with the rest of the world!

Moving on from myself to this weekends dramatic events that J-Dawg instructed me to report on...

It all began on a lonely friday night, many of us suffering from Loss of J-Dawg Syndrom (LJS) commonly found in the residents of floor 5... There was a knock at the door.. I answered to find myself confronted by some boisterous young offenders looking for a fellow flat mate and talking in a threatening manner. One of them was a large pakistani boy with blonde hair and a green viser, easily recognisable and a prime suspect. Alarmed I instantly denied all knowledge of fellow flat mate and sent them on their way, only to find them later returning in such a rage that a door was smashed!! We were all pretty shaken up, however we protected fellow flat mate the best we could, all of thinking if only J-Dawg was here to keep the peace.. 

Thankfully I'm here to tell the story and we are safe.. for now. However, we now have the one and only J-Dawg back so we know if/when these evil youths return we have the master to protect us.

Apart from this dramatic event it was your typical lonely/sad/bored weekend suffering from LJS.

Glad to have you back with us J-Dawg (you may not ever leave again)

Over and Out to all you homies out there,

G-Shady 

Greetings blog readers,

I have returned to the great land of Swansea after getting up horrendously early to catch the train back. I arrived however in good spirits after my harrowing journey and have now returned to my halls, where I proceeded to catch up with the weekends events. More on that later however, as our very own G-Shady will be the guestblogger, describing all the drama.

I had an extremely enjoyable weekend. Dad's retirement party was a success and I made a wonderful speech, further cementing my place as favourite child, and it was nice to catch up with lots of old family friends. Dad was going to be the guestblogger yesterday to describe the nights events but I think he was feeling a little worse for wear so I've asked him to email me his entry and I will post it later.

For now, I am stuck in my room attempting to revise on this bank holiday, getting nowhere. I still have a week and a hlaf till exams start however so no worries #gotages. As Gayvin shrewdly remarked earlier, bank holidays are a waste of time to students: to people who do nothing already, how is a day when shops and other services aren't open, at all helpful?

Peace out,

J-Dawg

Hiya Guys!

J-Dawg here, blogging from home in sunny Gloucestershire. I've gone home for the weekend to my Dad's retirement party, but I'll be back in Swansea on Sunday evening.

Let me pick up from where J-Dawg and I left you on Wednesday evening. We got back to Swansea and hit up od big time, fresh from our bus nap. There were some shapes pulled on the dancefloor the like of which had never been seen in these lands. Pretty tired from the 16 or so hours of drinking, some retired early, while I had to leave to help flatmate Gayv with some probs he was having. Happy to say that G-Shady, Pigsy and J-Dawg II kept it real till the early hours.

Not a great deal happened yesterday, went to the cinema to see the new American Pie film. Was pretty great, although to quote pigsy, 'was quite sexually driven'. (not the point of the films at all!) G-Shady then drove me to the station to get the train home. Ok, but I lost my headphones so had to listen to some noisy foreign people all the way from Cardiff to Bristol Parkway. I then struggled to open the train door, so almost got stuck on the way to Swindon! Think I would have jumped out of the window before going back there though.

So, here I am, back from lunch with the mum and sis, going to pick up newly appointed deputy head of school bro (begrudging congrats) from school in a mo, but not before a quick guest blog from my sister:

PS, before that, check out the photogallery for some swell pics from varsity.

Sophie:

Good afternoon Readers!

I am Sophie, J-Dawg's sis. He is pretty great.

I very much enjoyed picking up Jamie up yesterday. I don't know how I managed to get from Exeter to Bristol Parkway without Jamie's assistance driving, but after collecting him from the train station, his helpful comments really aided our journey (and relationship). I know others have benefited from Jamie's advice, especially Kelloggs, most notably the Sugar Puffs branch. Those who know Jamie well, will know of his great love for cereal. There's nothing that will grind his gears more than wasted flakes. So imagine the horror when, after pouring a bowl of cereal, half the Puffs fell down inside the packet. There was nothing for it, an email had to be written, telling the carton containers that their packaging was not up to the high standards of other brands. So Jamie did, you'll have to ask him for a copy of the email. And Kelloggs responded helpfully, offering apologies, the promise to try harder, and most importantly, a free box of cereal for Jamie. "And since then? Have they improved?" I hear you ask, well, you'll have to ask Jamie unfortunately, I can't stand Sugar Puffs.

Peace out,

Sophie

Apologies for her, despite doing English at university, she's still not very good at creative writing.